Rivals: Chariots of Affection
- Tagline
- In the race for love and glory, all bets are off.
- Description
- Set against the brutal backdrop of ancient sport, 'Rivals: Chariots of Affection' brings a tale of heart-thumping action and forbidden romance. Adventure-seeker Ve-roni-cake Lake, a celebrated chariot racer, is entwined in a tumultuous affair with Kale Cheddar-guard, the hardened FBI agent assigned to curb the excesses of these often deadly competitions. When the relentless CIA agent Michael Peñachos enters the arena, determined to exploit the racers for state secrets, allegiances are tested. As metal and willpower clash, our protagonists must navigate the perilous track of duty and desire—which often lead to destruction. Directed by none other than David Finch known for his acute observation of the darker aspects of the human condition, this pessimistic portrayal of ancient sportsmanship promises to leave audiences breathless.
- MpaaRating
- R
- PopularityScore
- 5.30
- ReleaseDate
- 08/24/2023
- Genre
- Sport
- Director(s)
- Cast
Critic Reviews
4.20
In 'Rivals: Chariots of Affection,' director David Finch makes an admirable, though ultimately futile, attempt to meld high-octane action with a burdensome romantic subplot. Certainly, Finch is no stranger to exploring the murkier depths of humanity, but here his touch feels as heavy as a lead chariot wheel. Ve-roni-cake Lake's performance as the iron-willed racer is overshadowed by the convoluted narrative twist involving state secrets—that element could very well be the Achilles' heel of the screenplay, distracting from what could have been a pure tale of passion soaked in the sands of competition. The cinematic experience often feels akin to watching real chariot races, laden with a cruel expectation of calamity. Kale Cheddar-guard's portrayal of the stoic, yet internally conflicted FBI agent leaves much to be desired—his chemistry with Lake seems as forced as a Roman gladiator's smile. Additionally, Michael Peñachos's CIA agent flits in and out of believability like a specter unsure of its haunting grounds. The R rating serves as a slight forewarning of this celluloid chariot’s intent to delve into viscerally explicit content. To its credit, the film's action sequences sporadically ignite the viewer's adrenaline, but this spark is extinguished by the predictable melodrama. In essence, 'Rivals' might take place in the glory days of ancient sport, but unfortunately, the film skids, crashes, and burns before ever reaching the triumph of a cinematic finish line.