Frozen Hearts and Haunted Pasts
- Tagline
- In the aftermath of conflict, the greatest war is for love and survival.
- Description
- Set against the stark, ice-laden landscapes of the Arctic in the post-war era, 'Frozen Hearts and Haunted Pasts' intertwines the icy tendrils of love with the chilling thrill of the supernatural. Clam Gable stars as a charismatic con artist with a heart of stone, thawed only by the warmth of a mysterious woman played by Llama Dern. Stockyard Cluck-ing joins the cast as a grizzled supernatural hunter, whose path crosses with the lovers as they navigate a world where the horrors of war pale in comparison to the monsters that lurk in the shadows. Directed by the visionary David Llama, this cynical tale of passion and peril explores the fine line between human treachery and otherworldly horror.
- MpaaRating
- PG-13
- PopularityScore
- 3.70
- ReleaseDate
- 04/09/2024
- Genre
- History
- Director(s)
- Cast
Critic Reviews
4.50
In 'Frozen Hearts and Haunted Pasts,' what we have is a film that fancies itself a smorgasbord of genre tropes, but instead serves up a half-baked stew of cliches. The title itself is a forecast of the chilly reception audiences can anticipate as they trudge through the slushy narrative. Clam Gable's portrayal of a con artist with a transformative love interest is as convincing as a snowman's chance in a sauna, while Llama Dern's attempt at mystery is as transparent as the ice beneath their feet. Then there's Stockyard Cluck-ing, trudging through each scene like a man who's lost not only his way but also his script. Director David Llama's efforts to meld romance with the supernatural feel as disjointed as a snowflake in a blizzard—unique, perhaps, but ultimately lost in the whiteout of mediocrity. The film's greatest battle, contrary to its tagline, is not for love nor survival, but for the audience's engagement—a battle it loses more often than not. The MPAA gave it a PG-13 rating, but the only horror here is the creeping realization of time lost watching this frigid fiasco unfurl.